FAKE IT 'TIL YOU MAKE IT

This is the inspiration for my latest parenting experiment. I don't know about you, but my kids physically and verbally abuse each other EVERY DAY. So I've instituted a new rule: Any time someone commits domestic misconduct of this nature, the offender must repent with a kiss. The number of kisses is in direct proportion to the number of offenses, so if the sibling resists the ante is upped accordingly.


It's working, kind of, I'm still giving it time to develop. But it has definitely made life more pleasant. I've made no headway imposing the traditional punishment of separations and time-outs. Listening to them recount how the other said something mean, pinched them in the arm, or stole a spot on the couch, often resulted in nothing more than me screaming my head off and reaching for a glass of wine. Lately, though, the tenor of these incidents has completely transformed. They know what's coming as soon as they commit the crime and before you know it we're all piled on one another in one jiggly, giggly blob. It morphs an unpleasant parenting moment into a revitalizing one.

I'm no expert, not even close, so please accept my experience with the little merit it deserves. But my kids are old enough, 11 and 7, to know what's right and wrong and to keep repeating the mantras, "Keep your hands to yourself," and "If you don't have anything nice to say, say nothing at all," just seems ineffective, not to mention, mind-numbingly frustrating.

So if they're like most siblings and won't show the love until they're grown, far away from mommy's scrutinizing stares, then I say, "fake it, 'til you make it" is good enough for me!