Wednesday, January 30, 2008

40 IS THE NEW 30


Really? Is that what they say? Cause, at 30, I don't remember my mother complaining of crow's feet, hot flashes and incontinence. Truthfully, I don't remember my mother at 30 because I was only 3, but trust me, she didn't talk about these things until she was closer to 50. If our generation is so youthful, so spry, so fountain of youth, then why are all my friends complaining that their bodies have hit the skids? My sister moans that since turning 40 she's had one long, chronic sinus infection and an extra 15 pounds that act like a bad house guest and refuse to leave. A friend complains she has to change out of her cold, sweat-drenched pajamas 2 to 3 times a night. Another one gripes of gray hairs that no amount of artificial color can cover. And when I'm out with the girls we hilariously, like a graceful circle of synchronized swimmers, pull out our reading glasses to read the menus.

Don't get me wrong, my friends and I are no hags. On the contrary, many of us, on a good day, could be labeled as M.I.L.F's. (Okay, maybe only by each other, but HEY, what are friends for??) Most of us eat well, take vitamins, exercise, yada, yada. We do everything most things right but we hit 40 and suddenly it's payback time. We took out high-interest loans on our nubile flesh to afford us a multitude of pleasures, excesses, and stupid mistakes. We deposited these sparkling, wild, and poignant memories into our mental banks to borrow against in our depleted old age. And so the reparations begin. But why should we pay for behaviors or actions that brought us no joy like bad posture, wearing uncomfortable shoes, or bad falls and injuries? That doesn't seem fair. Even having a baby, the most beautiful, natural, life-changing event, takes it's unjust toll when suddenly we can't take a crap without our hemorrhoids popping out or sneeze without streams of pee dribbling down our legs. (This actually happened to me when I cheered too loud after my son shot his first-ever basket and won the game for his team.)

If I only knew then what I know now, I would have appreciated my flat stomach, my strong bladder and my unblemished, silky, smooth hands. I would have learned to love my appearance, make the most of my flaws, rather than be my own worst judge. I would have listened to my OB-GYN and done more kegels!

So what's the point of this post besides sending you all into a depressed tailspin? The point is, whatever they say about 40 being the new 30, let's roll with it. Because when we hit 30, we mourned our 20's, at 40 we mourned our 30's. At 50, I presume we will mourn our 40's. Let's nip it in the bud and not waste any more of our precious time. Dr. Christiane Northrup, author of, THE WISDOM OF MENOPAUSE, describes this phase as an awakening - a time to replay the events of our lives and learn from our mistakes. An opportunity to do the things we've always wanted to do because we are aware that our time is valuable and it is limited.

We can look at this time in our lives as a glass half-empty or a glass half-full. I'm choosing the latter. You?

7 Comments:

InTheFastLane said...

Ever since kid #3 - I have mourned my old body? Probably not a coincidence that he was born the year I turned 31 and it seems like my body will never be same, because it won't. Time to move on and be ok with that? That is a tough process.

merlotmom said...

I think I have quite a few years on you, I'm 46, and have had time to come to these conclusions and be comfortable with them. I'm certainly not suggesting to let yourself go. That's not good for your physical or psychological well-being. Be the best you can be but accept that there are certain limitations as you get older. Bodies age with wear. It's a fact. I'm suggesting that we not waste anymore time bemoaning the fact and just enjoy. I hope that helps.

Manic Mommy said...

I get you, Merlot Mommy. "the big 4-0" comes up in September. Here we are contemplating another kid and praying that 40 truly IS the new 30. I hated my 20s, loved my 30s, and am looking forward to my 40s. I too plan to be a MILF.

That being said, I'm not opposed to botox and my boobs will stay where they belong through any natural or artificial means available.

I think the glass is half full put it's just got a little of that hazy dishwasher fog on it.

Manic Mom said...

MERLOT MOM!!!! This is too funny! I am not the Manic Mommy leaving you comments--you have stopped by my blog a couple of times and said, "By the way, funny comment you left on my blog today!" and I'm like, "Wait, I don't remember going to a blog called Merlot Mom today" and you never leave your link to your blog... SOOOO I googled Merlot Mom and found YOU here, and then went to the comments and discovered another Manic Mommy ABOVE this comment from me here (HI MANIC MOMMY above me, who must also have a terrific sense of humor!!! HAHAHAHA)...

Anyway, too funny about this mistaken identity in blogland!!!

merlotmom said...

Too funny!! Won't be making that mistake again!! Or maybe I will!

Manic Mommy said...

Well...Manic MOM was here first. I was the Mommy-Come-Lately. I check out her site just to keep abreast of what my twin is up to.

merlotmom said...

To Manic Mom and Mom-my: Just make sure you don't wear the same outfits and I should be fine from here.

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